Tuesday, August 25, 2009

WHAT?!!

Last night I worked with my least favorite coworker; I refer to him as 'Stachey Tech. (Picture a pudgy 30-something man with an unkempt mustache.) The reason he is my least favorite is twofold: first, he always has to be right about things. Even when there's nothing to disagree about, he will create a debate which he is determined to win. Second, he sometimes says things that are really strange and uncomfortable. Example: once he said that people who buy baby slings or carriers are lazy for not carrying their babies. Right. Come talk to me when your baby is more than a week old and we'll see if you (or your wife) have changed your story.

At one point in the evening it was pretty slow so I called Rob to chat and ask him about my dad's Jeep, which we had gotten inspected for registration. I think we talked about something else then wrapped up the conversation. When I hung up the phone, 'Stachey Tech said something like, "Oh, don't lie to him like that."

Reb: "Lie to him like what?"
S.T.: "You shouldn't tell him lies like that."
Reb: "Lies like what?"

In my mind I'm trying to figure out what I could have possibly said that would fit in to this strange joke S.T. was trying to pull off. The last thing I had said was "love you," so I knew he couldn't be talking about that because he's hard to get along with, but he's not psycho . . . or so I thought.

S.T.: "You said that you love him."

Wow. Absolutely incredible. How does anyone think that is something that you lightheartedly joke about to a coworker you barely know? Anyone who knows anything--ANYthing--about me knows that I adore Rob. I was completely stunned and all I could say was, "Wow, that's a really nasty thing to say." I said this as flatly as I could so he wouldn't think I was trying to go along with his twisted joke. He gave a chuckle, completely oblivious that he had insulted the one thing in my life I know I can always count on: my love for and from my husband.

Kissy kissy on your face!

It's probably a good thing I didn't have more time to think before I responded because things could have gotten even more unpleasant--I'm not very nice when people insult me or make me angry. The other technician working seemed as surprised and confused as I was. He said, "I believe her when she says she loves him!" and the conversation just kind of came to an awkward end. It was unbelievable.

Hey weirdo, mind your own business. And go trim your moustache.

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Demolition derby!!

This past weekend was the Utah County Fair and (hopefully) the birth of a new tradition for Rob and Reb: the demolition derby! I have been excited about this for weeks and weeks!

I think the woman behind us is pretty concerned about what's going on in the arena . . . or maybe this is her natural expression since this picture was taken between rounds when nothing notable was happening.

We were really rooting for car 01. My friend Summer's brother, Todd, was driving that car, as evidenced by the Skiba logo on the back. He didn't win the grand prize, but was named the most aggressive driver of the event.

Here's our crew--we took up a whole bench! My sisters Denise and Rachel both came with their families (and lots of goodies to share! :)

This is probably my favorite shot of the evening. The demolition derby is so cool!

This shot and the next are the fruits of my search for Big Hair. I had hoped to see more than I did, but what'll ya do? This picture illustrates The Bump . . .

while this picture shows a classic example of Big Bangs. Nice work, ladies!

This is the winning car, number 44. He was a maniac!

I quickly learned and was intrigued by the strategy involved in this sport. If you have never been to a demolition derby and you get the chance, take it--it was unbelievably fun!

Thursday, August 13, 2009

How does Facebook know me so well?

As many of you are aware, Facebook is a nice/convenient social network for keeping in contact with friends and family, playing games, voicing your opinions, showing off pics from vacations, and lots of other things. Another thing that Facebook does (and the whole reason it can exist) is advertising.

Usually I just ignore these advertisements; they are on the sidebar and don't get in my way at all. When I logged on to my profile today these were some of the ads that appeared on the page:

No big deal, right?

There is one particular ad that started to catch my eye; it is an ad for breast augmentation. Don't get the wrong idea; I'm not letting you in on any big secret wish I have. The reason this ad caught my attention is the picture they attached to the ad:

Really? This is the image you've selected to convince me that your practice is knowledgeable, professional, and trustworthy enough to perform a medical procedure on me? REALLY?

Creepy Facebook Doctor, as I have named him, seemed to appear every time I logged on to Facebook and it just made me laugh. I'm glad I saved this image to my desktop when I did, because now they have changed the image attached to this advertisement to this guy:

I guess at least this time they have an actual person, but I'm still getting the creepy vibe from this guy. Oh wait, the text under his picture has put my mind at ease:

Finally, I can have super confidence, and it will only cost me $2795. Thanks, Facebook!

Saturday, August 8, 2009

Pros and Cons

As we have made abundantly clear, Rob and I moved two weeks ago. I decided that it would be therapeutic to make a list of reasons I am both happy and sad about the move. (Sorry, it's just lots of words and no pictures. I totally understand if you don't have the patience to endure this post.)

Yay Apartment, Boo House

-It was always nice to never have to fix any appliances or do general maintenance work. We haven't had to mow a lawn, rake leaves, or shovel a snow-covered sidewalk since we got married.

-I will definitely miss the fitness center with its treadmills, stationary bikes, stair machines, ellipticals, weights, and racquetball court. We rarely if ever used the pool, hot tub, sauna, or volleyball court, but it was nice to know they were there if we wanted them.

Yay House, Boo Apartment
-Living both above and below strangers was miserable at times. This was most inconvenient when they wanted to make noise and we wanted it quiet or vice versa. I just got really frustrated toward the end with our neighbors downstairs who wouldn't simply knock on our door and ask us to be quiet; instead, they would call security and we would have an officer show up at our apartment. Okay, that only happened once, but I was home alone and not making much noise--but we've all heard that story before!

-The aforementioned volleyball court. It was right outside our apartment, but we didn't play volleyball once the entire three years we lived in our apartment. So why am I glad to leave it behind? It seemed to attract all the drunk tools who were all too eager to take off their shirts and show off their tats. All I can figure is that none of them had jobs because they would be playing by about 3:00 or 4:00 p.m. and would play until 10:00 or 11:00 some nights. On the weekends they would start as early as 8:00 a.m. There's nothing like a bunch of angry swears to wake you up and get your weekend going! In addition to all of this, our bedroom window was broken all the way across by an errant volleyball. We didn't notice until right before we moved, so I won't be surprised if we get charged to replace it.

Boo for Moving in General
-It's hard to find places to put all your stuff. This has been especially challenging this time around because some of the things we need ended up in storage and some of the stuff we won't be using is still in the house. Also, my parents left behind anything they won't need for the next year, so I have to either fit our stuff in with theirs or pack it for storage. Tricky!

-I now have to commute to Salt Lake for work. Hopefully this is just a temporary "Boo," but I'm not sure when they will be transferring me to Utah County. Once they do transfer me, I'll have to get used to new coworkers, doctors' offices, and customers, which can be kind of tough.

Yay for Moving in General
-It's good to go through all your junk and reevaluate what's important and what's not. DI tends to benefit a great deal from our moves.

-It's nice to get a fresh start with neighbors and ward members. You can be whatever you want to be. I guess that may sound strange, but I feel like I was kind of a slacker in my last ward (I like to blame it on being a student and regularly working 50-60 hours per week), but no one here knows that. I can start new here and it feels good.

Sunday, August 2, 2009